Living with people and living with trauma
“Ugh, Jay left their dishes in the sink again,” my housemate said to me. I am not Jay. I am not, nor have I ever been responsible for Jay’s behavior. Yet the first thing that my brain says to me is, “Wow, you fucked up again. This is all your fault. What’s wrong with...
From Trauma Surviving to Trans Thriving: “Not Your Fucking Rehab” and “Protection”
Poetry has been hugely healing for me as I've recovered from horrendous domestic and intimate partner violence. I wrote both the pieces about two different relationships with broken men who broke me. But in retrospect, they shared the same spirit and heart of...
Is this thing working?
“You’re not trying hard enough.” “The system works if you work it.” “If you have faith, this will help.” My therapist and I glared at each other when he said, “I don’t think you’re trying.” Actually, I glared, and I think he tried to have sympathetic therapist face....
8 Black Trans Artists to listen to this month
Music in itself can offer a powerful tool to shift emotions, connect with ourselves, and heal from trauma. This Black Trans History Month, we're celebrating eight Black trans musicians, both past and present, who spread hope, resistence, and healing through their...
Love Letters
I come from a house of notes. Not structured sentences with eloquent endings, but monosyllabic requests and replies. Need ride to work. Okay. Do dishes. Yes. Grunts on paper and averted eyes in the halls. We lived as strangers, ignoring the blood that deemed us...
Facing the Fog
Like many survivors of trauma, I have always struggled to see myself reaching old age. Long term plans sit in a swampy fog, the shadowy shapes of them barely visible, hard to conceptualise beyond the academic, bullet point description of: New apartment Get married ...