Contradictions
I’ve started to get “misgendered” at the airport again. I put “misgendered” in quotes, because I’m not entirely sure how I want to be gendered (by strangers) anymore. The TSA agent called me “ma’am” before I removed my mask for facial ID, and “sir” afterward. I...
Learning to Stay
I’m tired of shutting people out. I’m tired of cutting people off. I’m tired of ghosting people. I’m tired of people ghosting me. I want relationships where we work through the hard stuff. Where we are committed to each other even when we fuck up and say hurtful...
Living with people and living with trauma
“Ugh, Jay left their dishes in the sink again,” my housemate said to me. I am not Jay. I am not, nor have I ever been responsible for Jay’s behavior. Yet the first thing that my brain says to me is, “Wow, you fucked up again. This is all your fault. What’s wrong with...
From Trauma Surviving to Trans Thriving: “Not Your Fucking Rehab” and “Protection”
Poetry has been hugely healing for me as I've recovered from horrendous domestic and intimate partner violence. I wrote both the pieces about two different relationships with broken men who broke me. But in retrospect, they shared the same spirit and heart of...
Is this thing working?
“You’re not trying hard enough.” “The system works if you work it.” “If you have faith, this will help.” My therapist and I glared at each other when he said, “I don’t think you’re trying.” Actually, I glared, and I think he tried to have sympathetic therapist face....
8 Black Trans Artists to listen to this month
Music in itself can offer a powerful tool to shift emotions, connect with ourselves, and heal from trauma. This Black Trans History Month, we're celebrating eight Black trans musicians, both past and present, who spread hope, resistence, and healing through their...